Get Real–Be Human in Person and in Your Writing
Like many of us Bizniks, I’m having many conversations with people who don’t know me well. If you pay attention in this kind of situation, you learn a lot about how you’re perceived by others. Something I’ve heard from several people lately is, “wow, you’re really real.” This statement is usually delivered with some degree of surprise, because, I assume, I’m promoting my business while being my natural self.
Can a person successfully represent a business and still be “real”?
I would argue that, not only can you do it, it’s essential to true success. You should see how people relax the longer they talk with me. Shoulders lower, speech gets more natural, and there’s a lot more genuine laughter when they realize that there’s no need for pretense. I’m ok with showing my true character, and my behavior gives them permission to do the same.
The same idea should apply when you are writing for your customers. Anything you write, especially if you’re trying to woo new clients, had better be real. When you are the customer, are you going to trust the business that talks about “synergy,” and “optimizing solutions”? What does that even mean?! No, you’re probably going to trust the business that is talking to you, in the authentic way that people actually talk. A business that sounds like it contains real people, that has the courage to openly display their meaning, is one that inspires trust in its potential customers.
In my experience, people are relieved to work with someone who isn’t pretending to be something other than human. Being human means being a little messy. It means not always saying the perfect, polite, appropriate thing. I know that seems scary; we don’t want to lose customers by writing something that could be taken the wrong way. But by being yourself, you attract customers with whom you actually enjoy working. And enjoying your work, to me, is a huge sign of success.
September 18th, 2006 at 11:18 pm
This is reminding me about a big “ah-ha” that a bunch of us had at the seminar that Chris and Dominic did on the 10 Big Marketing Mistakes of Small Business. The “ah-ha” is that we CAN have the kinds of clients and customers we want. We can work with who we want. We can be just exactly who we are, and in doing so attract the kinds of people that will appreciate our services, skills and style.
Most of us wanted out of the rubberstamp Walmart world in the first. Why on earth would we want to recreate in our own little domain?
Could it be we really don’t trust our ability to “break the rules” and make a go of it? Perhaps it is that while we have rejected certain models of doing business, we have yet to craft new ones that are in align with our values and interests.
Probably just because we are listening to the fears that whisper in our ears, rather than the inspirations that told us we can leap and find wings on the way.
September 19th, 2006 at 8:57 am
So I agree whole heartedly! This kind of ties in with the talk about putting your photo on Biznik, creating that authenticity and trust.
So here is one of my fears and failings when it comes to writing. I want to express myself so that my clients and visitors to my site and blog get to know me, but my grammar is really bad. I have taken numerous classes and have a Masters degree BUT my grammar is still very bad which sends an unprofessional message and can be a barrier to people believing in me and what I offer. I can’t seem to wrap my head around good grammar.
Should those of us grammar challenged not write?
September 19th, 2006 at 1:56 pm
Phoenix, I understand that it can be really challenging to deal with the stigma of bad grammar. I know several highly intelligent people who just have a blind spot when it comes to grammar.
What I would say is that some skills just need a lot more practice than others. I have a lifelong struggle with timeliness, which is somewhat crippling if you’re an independent service provider. I don’t imagine that being on time will ever come easily to me, but I keep fighting the good fight with my psyche.
If writing is important to you and your business, which it sounds like it is, then I’d keep working on it. Maybe your blog posts need to always go through a revision or two before you make them public. Maybe you can partner with a friend who has good grammar that would be willing to briefly review and edit your posts. There are always solutions to be had if you’re willing to put in the time.
Keep in mind that your audience will be somewhat tolerant of grammar mistakes, too. I see them everywhere, even in the most professional communications. You don’t have to be perfect. And judging from your post, you aren’t as grammar-challenged as you say you are. I wouldn’t say that the grammar challenged shouldn’t write; I would say that the grammar challenged should continue their pursuit of self-improvement.
September 19th, 2006 at 1:59 pm
FYI, there are one or two grammar mistakes in what I just posted. So even the self-professed grammarian and writing coach commits errors from time to time. Take heart!
September 19th, 2006 at 6:51 pm
Bah. Grammar is totally overrated. I always say write how you talk (and learn the glory of the comma. The comma is your friend) and leave grammar to English teachers.
September 19th, 2006 at 8:43 pm
I agree to a certain extent, Chris. “Write how you talk” is great advice for people who are trying to break free of their fear of the grammar beast. On the other hand, people usually need to know the rules before they feel they can break them. What say you, Phoenix?
September 19th, 2006 at 10:29 pm
Well I agree with both of you. As an undergraduate I took a memoir class and really enjoyed it but felt like the dumb kid in the class when it came to sharing my work. In graduate school I really struggled with the grammar in my papers and kept questioning my place within the program due to this. Intelligent people are expected to write well and have mastered the grammar game.
This transcends into the work environment, you are judged on your written word, its structure and content as much as the overall decisions you make. This is not fair because one does not inform the other however it is reality.
When a visitor and potential client comes to my website the first impression is important. I was recently informed that due to my grammar on my website I was not a good fit. So it has made me review what I am saying and how I say it. I haven’t decided yet if I will do an overhaul of my writing or just make corrections. We all have varied skills, mine is just not grammar.
(This posting has been put through the rigors of Microsoft Word grammar and spelling tool.)
September 20th, 2006 at 3:22 pm
When in high school I loved to write, but teacher’s pretty much beat that out of me with the grammar stick. Six years ago I landed myself in Asia and started to write as a way of trying to make sense of a world that was wildly different from what I’d know. People liked what I wrote. And as my Chinese got better, my English got worse. I’d mix up grammars. Screw up tense. totally use Chinese word order in English sentences.
I didn’t care either. I found a voice.
No, it is not that I found a voice. I just let it out.
I still do.
I think it is important, not just important, but vital that we speak and write our own voices.
That being said, I know that my grammar is not standard, so when I know that there will be some public scrutiny of my writing. I do run it by a friend that happens to know grammar like I know acupuncture points. I appreciate his advice, but don’t always follow it.
Sure, grammar is a set of accepted rules for language, but most of us don’t follow them that closely anyway. If someone is going to look at you crosseyed for the grammar you use, there just might be other things about them that would make working with them less than a joy to all concerned.
If you want some permission and inspiration to write. Look at Wiild Mind by Natalie Goldberg!